Are You Addicted to Weed?

If you can answer yes to at least two of the following questions, you may have an addiction to weed:

1) You skip other activities because you just have "a little more" weeding to do.
2) When weeds are in sight, you find yourself preoccupied with them.
3) You tell yourself you can stop whenever you want, but then you keep weeding.
4) You find stress relief from weeding.
5) Even when you experience negative consequences (caked fingernails, rough hands, torn gloves, sore back, aching knees) you continue the behavior.

Although I grew up in Colorado, I am clearly not referring to that kind of weed. Weed Addict may be a bit strong, Weedophile sounds creepy, so I'll call myself a Weeder. During childhood I did some occasional weeding, but my first clear memory of weed-induced euphoria was the summer after I graduated high school. My sister and I were weeding along our fence and we noticed that thistle had overrun our elderly neighbor's roses. He grew prize-winning roses that he'd brought with him from Texas, but they'd been neglected while his wife had been very ill. We decided to do him a favor. We rang, and no one answered, so we tried the gate and found it unlocked. An hour later his roses were restored to full glory and I had fallen in love with gardening gloves. Since then I have weeded playgrounds, friends' lawns while the kids played in the pool, strangers' curbside landscaping, school grounds, yards of abandoned homes, neighbors' gardens (with and without permission), and of course my own and family members' yards and gardens.  I have pulled weeds taller than myself, removed goat heads bare-handed, sneaked into yards at night to weed, and offered free weeding to complete strangers. I lose track of time because I have a completion goal in mind. It's not "I'll quit in half an hour," it's "I'll quit when the compost bin can't be packed more or when this area is weed-free."

So with all this passion for weeding, you'd think our Community Garden would be heaven for me. But no. All those weeds have actually taught me to prioritize, relinquish my expectation of control, and put on blinders. I've learned that 5% vinegar barely affects weeds and that rhizomal weeds (bindweed and hoary cress), are better embraced and kept at bay than attacked full-on. Because we don't use commercial herbicides, we are trying black plastic to solarize some of the weeds. An 81-year old man visited RPCG and told me it takes 3-4 years of solarization to eradicate the bindweed. For anyone searching for job security, I say "Weeders of the world, pull together!"


At my Aunt's beautiful home in Logan, I could have been playing in the pool with my kids, but then I discovered a patch of thistle hiding on the edge of her property. No worries, I had a bandanna and work gloves stashed in the car for just such emergencies. And yes, I'm proud of my Full-fledged Farmer's Tan.